Zur Hölle, war das knapp. Wenig Geld, viel Konkurrenzdruck und ein Suizidversuch: Eishockeytorwart Ben Meisner erzählt

Er hatte alles vorbereitet: das Seil aus dem Baumarkt besorgt, am Treppengeländer im zweiten Stock vor seiner Wohnung befestigt, das andere Ende zur Schlinge geknüpft und um den Hals gelegt. Er stand auf Zehenspitzen. Es fehlte nicht viel, »und alles wäre vorbei« gewesen, schreibt Benjamin »Ben« Meisner in einem Bericht, der am Dienstag auf dem Portal »The Players’ Tribune« veröffentlicht wurde. Niemand hätte groß Notiz von seinem Suizid genommen: »Ich bin nicht Connor McDavid. Zur Hölle, ich bin nicht einmal in der NHL.«

Der 1990 im kanadischen Halifax geborene Meisner ist kein Star der National Hockey League (NHL) wie McDavid, sondern ein früherer College-Eishockeyspieler, der es in eine drittklassige Profiliga in Nordamerika, die East Coast Hockey League (ECHL), geschafft hatte. Nur kurz ging es für ihn eine Etage höher in die American Hockey League (AHL), das Sprungbrett in die NHL. Er profitierte damals von der Verletzung eines Stammtorhüters des NHL-Klubs Anaheim Ducks (Kalifornien). Als der aus der Rehabilitation zurückkehrte, stieg Meisner wieder in die EHCL ab, wo er seinerseits einen Keeper verdrängte, der sich auf dem Sprung nach oben wähnte. So läuft das. Das System ist ein Teufelskreis – mit emotionalen Abstürzen, mentalen Blockaden und Leistungsknicks.

In den unteren Ligen tummelt sich ein Spielerprekariat. Meisner rechnet vor: 500 Dollar brutto pro Woche verdienen die Puckjäger im Schnitt, nach Abzügen bleiben keine 400 übrig. Die Klubs kalkulieren knapp, das Budget für die Saison wird oft mühsam zusammengeklaubt. Reich wird hier keiner.

Und auch Meisner kalkulierte: bei 98 professionellen Eishockeyteams in Nordamerika sind doppelt so viele Torhüter angestellt. Hunderte weitere lauern auf ihre Chance – alle wild entschlossen, aufzusteigen. Meisner: »In meinen Gedanken wurden sie zu meinen Feinden.« Die permanente Angst, wegen fehlender Einsatzzeiten den Job zu verlieren, habe ihn krank gemacht. Die Panik vor dem Ruin wurde lebensbedrohlich: »Ich fühlte mich, als wäre ich nur wenige Zentimeter vom Tod entfernt.«

Er wollte weg, verließ Nordamerika. Seit der Saison 2014/2015 spielt Meisner in Deutschland. Vom damaligen Zweitligisten Fischtown Pinguins (Bremerhaven) wechselte er zum Erstligaklub Augsburger Panther, für den er in drei Spielzeiten nur 61 Ligapartien absolvierte. Er wollte öfter spielen, wechselte deshalb kürzlich zum Traditionsverein Tölzer Löwen (zweite Liga). Seit Anfang des Jahres ist er in psychologischer Behandlung. Das hat ihm das Leben gerettet.

Gibt es einen direkten Zusammenhang zwischen Profisport und solchen Psychokrisen? Mirko Wegner, Leiter der Abteilung Sportpsychologie im Institut für Sportwissenschaft der HU Berlin, meint gegenüber jW: »Wissenschaftliche Studien belegen, dass Hochleistungssportler nicht anfälliger für Depressionen sind als der Durchschnitt der Bevölkerung.« Der liege bei etwa zehn Prozent. Einzig bei Langstreckenläufern seien Essstörungen und Sportsucht überproportional häufig.

Meisner will eine bessere psychologische Betreuung der Spieler. »Wir müssen mehr tun«, ist sein Appell an Vereins- und Verbandsbosse: Welche Verantwortung hat die Liga? »Unsere Aufgabe als Ligagesellschaft ist es, einen fairen Umgang zu gewährleisten – und dies auch von den Klubs einzufordern«, erklärt René Rudorisch, Geschäftsführer der zweiten Deutschen Eishockeyliga (DEL2), gegenüber jW: Der Belastungsgrad im Leistungssport werde oft unterschätzt. »Neben den eigenen Zielen gilt es, die Anforderungen des Sportsystems zu erfüllen, und zwar meist im Fokus der Öffentlichkeit.« Das verkrafteten nicht alle gleichermaßen.

Für Wegner ist die Resilienz, die psychische Widerstandsfähigkeit eines Athleten, ausschlaggebend dafür, wie gut er mentale Belastungen abfedern kann. Der Professor plädiert für die frühere Vermittlung sportpsychologischer Grundlagen auf Vereinsebene. Dispositionen ließen sich so rascher erkennen.

Meisner ist nicht gesprungen. Viel Sympathie bekommt er von den Fans, Rückendeckung von seinem neuen Klub: »Alle sollen im Sport wie Roboter funktionieren. Ben hat gezeigt, dass man Lebenskrisen bewältigen kann – das ist absolut respektabel«, betonte Christian Donbeck, Geschäftsführer der Tölzer Löwen, gegenüber jW. Und: »Wir haben einen hervorragenden Torwart verpflichtet.«

Quelle: https://www.jungewelt.de/artikel/338227.eishockey-zur-h%C3%B6lle-war-das-knapp.html

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